February 2011
“Toot-a-loo-motha-fucka-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a”
– Mr. Chow, The Hangover
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goose bumps
Phone call from my dad earlier in the day
Me: Hello?
Dad: Russell…
Me: Yeah… is everything okay?
Dad: No, I don’t think I’m going to make it
Me: Make it where? To the bathroom?
Dad: No, I think I am going to die soon.
Me: Oh okay, I’ll be there to visit you after class tonight
I then go visit my dad at the nursing home he is in after class and right when I...
Oh my god
So I’m sitting in this boring ass lecture class and this one kid is snoring a few seats away for me. My professor looked pissed, but before he could say anything the guy sleeping ripped the hugest fart and no one laughed except for me. They all tried holding it back and I couldn’t. Oh my god I am crying. I had to put my head down but I still was laughing and being disruptive so...
Social Etiquette Rule #6
Don’t chew with your mouth wide open.
Don’t talk with your mouth full of food
I don’t even know why this has to be explained, but no one wants to see what you are ingesting in a chomped up form.
TABLE MANNERS. How difficult of a concept is that? Were these people raised at their local zoo by a family of chimps?
Anonymous asked: LOL your friend in that picture looks like a man
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The United States of America
logicallypositive:
stillmindstillcosmos:
Has a new national anthem.
all hail the emperor!!
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I just had the closest near death experience ever
I’m sure you are expecting me to write about how I was in a huge car accident or someone tried to mug me, but my near-death-experience came via a potato chip.
I was just sitting here eating a sandwich with some chips (mind you they are extra crunchy) and I tried to swallow and this huge piece got lodged in my throat and I was choking and dying and I didnt have any water. That was really...
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“We have to begin to build in the neighborhood, have restaurants, have cleaners,...”
– Bill Cosby (via graceinmyheart)
January 2011
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Social Etiquette Rule #17
Earphones were invented for a reason.
No one wants to hear your shitty techno beats, your annoying gangsta rap, or your suicidal music. So please, for the sake of humanity, put your earphones in and enjoy your shitty taste in music by yourself without making everyone around you want to bash their head into the nearest wall.
On a side note: When listening with your earphones make sure it...
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You know when you say 'someone out there has it...
getinthecar:
I wonder who actually has it the worst of all, and do we all have to be being raped, starving, addicted to drugs, whist bleeding to death in a gutter just to be able to say we’re having a bad day without some dick head bitching at you?
This ^
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Sometimes I wish I was like my “loser” self in high school because I had no friends, no social life, nothing at all and all I had were my grades. I was always the kid in class that got the highest grade on a test but no one would ever talk to me. I remember I would pay attention to the teacher talking just because I was so nervous with all the people around me. I remember I would sweat...
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sucks to compare
There is always one person that you have to compare yourself to just so you can never be happy. You want to be them, have what they have, and everything else that creates a zealous attitude. You can’t be content with what you have and just be happy. Everything is a random competition in your head and it drags you down. In the end you know you won’t be better or win...
Things not to do with your future child:
One time my mom fed my brother so many carrots when he was a baby that he turned orange and she rushed him to the hospital because she didn’t know what was the matter with him.
Watchreblog if you are single and this song just makes you want to cry
oh it is love
If I don’t get a Valentine this year then I will just propose to the nearest fire hydrant and ask it to marry me. It is red for love.
I've never had a Valentine on Valentine's day
everyone and everything is annoying me today
what else is new
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Anonymous asked: who was it? I had a similar thing happen to me. After four months I found out. All the photos/videos/stories were made up/stolen. :\
It really sucks, especially when you consider them a great friend. I'm sorry you're going through it, but you've got your other friends, and you're one of the realest (that's not a word, whatever) on here. Stay cool.
It really sucks, especially when you consider them a great friend. I'm sorry you're going through it, but you've got your other friends, and you're one of the realest (that's not a word, whatever) on here. Stay cool.
That awkward moment when you find out people that...
Lol, I didn’t even know people still do this. Come on now, this isn’t Myspace anymore. Grow up.
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Anonymous asked: how old are you?
commanderinqueef asked: you said to holler at you if we were hot? hi ;) LOL
statehate asked: Have you told your parents about us yet?
Anonymous asked: are your parents okay with you being gay?
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Watch100percenthipster:
Martin Luther King Jr. commemoration video.
imfamousontumblr asked: russell, if i wear a wig, will you love me?
thelifeofnico-deactivated201109 asked: wanna make out?
People unfollowed me because I weigh 135 lbs.
Anonymous asked: how tall are you and how much do you weigh?
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make a post
wait for people to respond or something
delete it 10 minutes later
repeat
repeat
repeat
